Work Outside the Home?

I find myself in an icky place :( I had surgery to correct some "womanly issues" two months ago. I took those two months off from babysitting in order to recover. I had planned to welcome the little ones back next week. That won't be happening now. I received the terrible news that will no longer be able to care for children as I can no longer do any lifting. It took me quite awhile to be able to mention it without crying and even now if I think about it too much I cry again. No more little ones. We were only blessed with one child and childcare was a way for me to still have the house full of children I longed for. That is gone now.

Sooo, after all these years I need to find employment doing something where I won't have to lift anything. All the time I worked outside the home I longed desperately to return home full time. I had started working outside the home when my son went to grade one and I so regretted it but found myself (as I am sure many women do) stuck there. Suddenly we "needed" my income. And now here we are needing my income and I don't have any!

My sister has suggested I apply for a retraining program. This would be fine as I have notes from my doctor and the agency I worked for stating that I need retraining but retraining to do what?

My whole life all I ever wanted to be was a wife and mother. All my high school courses were geared toward that goal. I took every single home ec. course I could! I never wanted a career, I never wanted to work outside the home.

When I became a Christian I read in the Bible that God means for women to be "Keepers at Home" How can you be a keeper at home if you are not at home?

I am praying and trusting God for His leading as I know He knew about all this before it ever happened and that He has a plan for me. How grateful I am for my relationship with Him. I could not imagine what it would be like to face uncertainty without God. To have my life turned upside down without the assurance that God is with me through it all and that just because one door closed doesn't mean a new and better one won't open. Only He knows what lies ahead...I wait and I trust.

Blessings,
Liisa

P.S. I welcome any thoughts and ideas you may have. ~smile~